Before The Fall

Hubbie here. Today I want to tell you a bit about Pauline’s father; about Daddy; about before Lewy.

Pauline has told you before that we don’t have any children. The reasons are a long story for another day. That being the case we are probably not the best to judge Lewy’s “relative age”. Pauline has touched upon this as well. Many people before us have noted that humans in the latter stages of life take on the traits of humans in their early years. So by “relative age” we mean the childhood age that is equivalent to where Lewy is now.

A few years back I would tell everyone that having Pauline’s father living with us was like having a seventy-something year old teenager in the house. And it was true. When Daddy was driving he drove way too fast and, of course, got really defensive if you mentioned it. He’d sit in his room and play guitar. He slept late most mornings and stayed out late on many nights. Some nights he did not come home at all! I tried that once as a teenager and it didn’t go over too well. But even with a relative age of 18, Daddy was still Daddy. We couldn’t ground him and I sure as hell was not going to spank him, though I will admit that the idea strikes me as hysterical.

Pauline has told you (seems to be a theme here) her father is, was, an excellent dancer. Many years ago he and her mother took ballroom dancing lessons. When they retired to Florida; The Elderly People’s Republic, the community they chose to reside in held dances at least once a week. They had live bands and refreshments. Pauline and I attended a New Year’s Eve dance there one year so I can vouch for the fact that this bunch of old folks knew how to party. They all knew how do dance well but Pauline’s parents were often the stars of the show.

Sometime after Daddy came to live with us he began to develop a social network. His sister, Crazy Aunt Tom, lived near here and they would go to dances once or twice a week. There Daddy met a number of folks his age and many of them, like him, had lost their spouse. As we all know wives typically outlive their husbands (insert your favorite joke on the subject here) so most of the ones in that category were widows. And many of those widows loved to dance; and flirt. For Daddy it was a perfect storm, he loved to dance, he loved to flirt, and he was really good at both. Heck, he is still really good at the latter.

I’m here to tell you something………… Guys, learn to dance. If you do then when you get old you have it made. Daddy told me about the dances once. It seems they are a lot like every high school dance you ever attended; unless they came with a group, the girls sat with the girls and the boys sat with the boys. It seems Daddy was the king of the boys as far as the widows were concerned. He was reasonably well off; he was in good shape; he was (is) a natural flirt; and he could dance! He told me that he could make eye contact with a lady across the dance floor, then do that “come here” motion with his index finger and the lady would actually come gliding across the floor to dance with him. In no time at all he had girlfriends. You read it right…………girlfriends……..plural. It is really strange to have a 60 or 70 year old woman call and ask “Is Daddy there?”

You can hear the 16 year old girl that they used to be in their voice. It’s kind of creepy.

To be fair, Daddy never really “played the field”. There was always a primary lady. But there was always a back-up. And Lord did they pamper him. One lady would come over and cut his hair and trim his nails. I actually kept expecting one to call and ask,

“Can Lewy come out and play?”

“No, Lewy stayed out all night so he is in sitting in the corner.”

“Would you tell him I called?...........Please!”

“Sure honey. He’ll call you later.”

When Lewy and a lady latched on to each other as something special, was when it got really weird. They would be like two teenagers going steady. They would talk on the phone; and they talked like teenagers.
Daddy would get this school boy laugh and we could only imagine what she was saying. I know what we did as teenagers but transposing that to Daddy and his girlfriends was……………..weird………very weird.

One day when Pauline was away. Daddy, for some reason, decided to tell me about why he had not come home the night before. My brain shut down. All I remember is “then we got in the shower”. My brain plugged imaginary fingers in my ears and screamed “La la la la la la…………”.

So for those of you who are elderly, I hope you have sex every night so hot that it makes the neighborhood dogs howl - but please, don’t ask; and for God’s sake don’t tell! Those of us right behind you might be encouraged by your exploits but that won’t do us any good if some terribly disturbing image is burned into our brain.

I mean really, what are you, ...sixteen years old?

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Pauline here.

The hospice ladies came by today. Yvonne, is so nice. A lovely petite lady from South America. She washes Daddy and changes the bed. Daddy is clean. Very clean. Nurse Goodbody came by too. We changed his dressings, Daddy's vital signs were fine. I'm still withholding the pain meds, and he is eating and drinking better. Still not enough to do much more than sustain.

Lewy is hallucinating a lot. Last night he was worried about some piece of the ship as they navigated under the San Fransisco Bay Bridge. I told him I over heard the Skipper say everything was all right; Not to worry.

He was relieved a bit.

And OBTW, Lewy's last girlfriend called today. She's coming over to see him.


1 comments:

old friend said...
I'm glad Lewy's lady is coming...tell her to wear perfume!

good writing, Hubbie.